Writings

9/22/25

y'all ask for too much, thats why everything sucks for u

9/6/25

i want that head on a spike so i never have to see another dumb fuckin green screen video from anybody

8/30/25

lately in my dreams, ive been living in some sort of amusement park loosely based around my interests. nothing branded or labeled tho, not even resembling real places. when i eagerly arrive at the arcade, the lights on all the machines are off. they're next to active bowling lanes and theres a counter to get food at. all of my "friends" are there, but i only know a few. however, nobody is a stranger. the theater section has a stage with all kinds of instruments in front of a projector screen so we can all enjoy films and perform/play music in the same auditorium. but we never can. i wake up. something that never seems to leave my mind is how i feel just viewing any of this, even when my eyes are closed. how happy i am. how unnecessary worrying is. pain does not exist though u fully know its there. the entire world constructed just for me (by me) is at my fingertips in this realm but i never abuse the power, even if i wanted to. i could only experience this in life, through living but, i never could in reality. i get the same joy (though fleeting) when listening to certain music, but im currently unable to find something else to give me that peace. everything i want is here and around me but none of it is real.

8/3/25

id like to go on record saying i fully support and hope to accelerate the assassination of the current president, and all those who reside safely beneath his tiny nuts. i want him dead. fill a room with him and his family, some other billionares and politicians, give me an mp5 and i will proudly spray em all down myself. those who truly deserve to die are never the ones attacked.

7/14/25

got a new cd in the mail today. gorillaz eponymous album. i was supposed to get the kmfdm symbols album but the place said the item was damaged and asked if i wanted a replacement. shame tho cause the original price for the kmfdm cd was only 8 bucks, unlike every other copy of that album. its the kmfdm album i want rn, i got naive (hell to go), angst, xtort, adios, and money already and i really have no interest in buying their singles because you know, they've got one or two songs only.

6/29/25

sometimes my parents make me wanna eat a gun. yes i live rent free but i do all the housework because of that and i feel like they just fuckin use me for everything they can. they will tell me to do something that they could have done in the time they spent telling me to do said thing. i have to clean up after every single person in my family as well as all of our pets. they appear to have the expectation that i will do everything because i am an unemployed little bitch who cant drive. they cant seem to understand how spread thin i am around the house. its so fucking exhausting. sometimes i feel they dont give a shit about me, only when its convenient for them. anything i say is dismissed. they are why i feel "wrong" for simply being upset. i wonder what i could have been if they hadnt filled me with all this dread and anxiety and if they hadnt kept me around as their lap dog. they never encouraged me to do anything with my life other than ultra-vague demands of what they wanted. they dont care about my individuality or situation and im expected to sit down and shut the fuck up because i'm fucking worthless. all those dreams i have where i am screaming and crying to them that i want to kill myself and they dont bat a fuckin eyelid start to make more and more sense every day. i cant even escape because they wont teach me how to drive. either theres no time or they dont want to do it. OR they'll expect me to try driving right after i smoke a bowl they gave me. and its somehow all my fault? i am my own person but goddamnit i am ultimately powerless here. AND THEY FUCKING KNOW THIS.

6/25/25

i swear to god so many of u online people need to be shot. i would like to see a room filled of those arrogant pieces of shit and rain down a hellstorm of bullets all over their dumb fuckin faces. scumbags. these people find any reason to argue over ANYTHING. i once watched a hundred people argue about lisa simpson and baseball etiquette in the comment section of a youtube short made by a robot farming views and cash for some lazy greedy fuck. i hate all of you and yet, i cannot find any of you. if youre one of these types of people, fuck you, eat shit.

6/22/25

made some DAMN good sandwiches today. i took a stack of bread and a stack of deli meats and shuffled em together like a deck of cards. scooby style. best sandwich of all time will always be the mcchicken. fuck off if u dont think the mayo is like savory nectar from the gods.

6/20/25

if you give a young teenager or a child a cell phone capable of unrestricted internet access, you are unwittingly inviting them to the adult world you so desperately want them to avoid. they are now in a world mixed up of what they do not yet understand and what they only believe they want in life. their curiosity will be manipulated by capitalist greed, and their innocence ruthlessly hunted and challenged by predators. no amount of parental control on a smartphone or tablet can fix this. there is no blame here, only prevention.

6/18/25

my dog passed a year ago today, missin the lil silly. i have a cool snake to keep me company tho.

6/17/25

this is my first entry ill be using as a test; kill the elite, arm the homeless.

- el thoughtzos -

"Prometheus was punished by the gods for giving the gift of knowledge to man. He was cast to the bowels of the Earth and pecked by birds."

"im useless, but not for long. the future is coming on"

"when its cold, and when its dark, the freezing moon can obsess you."

hundreds of mass shootings in our country every year and 2nd amendment freaks refuse to adknowledge the issues surrounding america's gun culture. we wouldnt need guns in modern society if you had never sold them to us. you perpetuate violence to maximize profit and continue to feed off the lower class.

i prefer chaos, the evil use order to mask their identities

KILL THE PRESIDENT!!!

if someone is sentenced to life for an undeniable violent crime, just kill em? why are you wasting money on a life you don't want to ever return to society? hide behind your ethics and keep bleeding em, i guess."we euthanize but keep alive the lowest form of prison life"

"when they come for me i'll be sitting at my desk, with a gun in my hand, wearing a bulletproof vest"

bullying does not cause school shootings. it is a scapegoat used to shy away from all the adult's responsibilities

"You are more than the sum of what you consume, desire is not an occupation"

"Compromise, conformity, assimilation, submission, ignorance, hypocrisy, brutality, the elite; All of which are American dreams"

"the owls are not what they seem."

peaceful protest is an illusion used to keep the people under the oppressor's thumb. fight the war, fuck the norm

"it has to be a unanimous determination because one opinion would be a pointless appreciation."

what's the point of living if you're just waiting to die?